Painting by Belynda Wilson Thomas
Change your thoughts and you change your world. Norman Vincent Peale
Yesterday, my Grandson said my face is cracked. When we reach the point in life, our grandson says we have a cracked face. What can we do about it?
Have I been relaxing a bit too much, not getting ready for the day, and skipping makeup? Aging is a natural part of life, and we need to embrace it because it’s inevitable. Moms and Grandmas will have their flaws pointed out by those they love the most. Mom’s two oldest daughters told her she was old when she was about twenty-eight.
There are things we can’t fix, but there might be changes we can make. I’ve spent my life tweaking things, and I think tweaking things helps, but there might be times when big changes are needed.
Ramit Sethi tells us that too often we spin our wheels trying to fix the system, when what we might need to do is overhaul the system.
How do we know if we can tweak something, or if a big change is what we need? Do we sometimes go for the big overhaul when we didn’t need to be that drastic, or try to tweak when our life calls out for big change?
I’m thinking of this as I watch videos of people discussing grey divorce, which seems drastic, and unless one has huge financial reserves, could be a significant mistake. Am I wrong in thinking that if you could live with someone for thirty years, why jump ship now? Take this job or marriage and shove it might not be the best decision. They are big gestures, but blowing up our lives because we need some change doesn’t mean we should dump everything and start over.
Is “I’m not happy” a reason to end a marriage? Happiness is fleeting, an inside job, and our spouse doesn’t make us happy. If we feel we need more in our lives, what do we need? It probably isn’t a new spouse, even though the excitement might feel good for a while. Wouldn’t a new spouse become an old spouse pretty quickly?
Can we fall in love with our old spouse again? Can we see what we saw in them so many years ago, before the mortgage, kids, bills, and responsibilities piled up? Who were we when we met, when a look across a room held so much promise? Has discontent with ourselves spilled over into discontent with them? What can we do to improve our lives without blowing it up? How can we make ourselves happy, what used to make our hearts sing? Where did we like to go, what did we like to experience, and can we bring it back into our lives?
There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. William Shakespeare
One of the joys in life is sitting at the table, holding our grandchildren, and sharing a laugh over their antics. It’s a small thing, but a lot of small things lead to a good life. We might long for grand gestures, but maybe they are overrated, and maybe the small things that any couple can share are underrated. How often have we been touched by a commercial that captures small moments? Tim Horton’s commercials come to mind.
There are also big moments; a friend and her husband celebrate the arrival of a long-awaited grandchild. If there weren’t tears in their eyes, I’d be shocked. There are tears in mine, as I think about it.
We have cataclysmic shifts in our lives; a friend lost her husband before Christmas. She’s ninety-four and doesn’t know how she’ll go on without him. Sometimes we have to deal with what happens, and sometimes we get to choose what happens.
As we take stock of where we are and what is possible, do we need to choose wisely? Can we always make something better or worse, even if all we can change is our attitude?
The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude. Oprah Winfrey
If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude. Maya Angelou
When we are no longer able to change a situation – we are challenged to change ourselves. Viktor Frankl
Thank you for reading this post. Have a blessed day filled with gratitude, joy, and love.